Having a crush on someone is both a thrilling and terrifying experience. Is there a chance they’ll feel the same way about you? Do they catch you staring at them or overhearing you rave about them in conversation? Do they have the same flutters or pangs of longing when they’re with you that you do? When they don’t, it can be really painful.
Signs You Should Move On From a Crush
Our feelings and actions will be shaped by our unique set of experiences, but that doesn’t mean we can’t stop to reflect every once in a while.
Fixating on a crush might keep us stuck in unhealthy cycles of intense emotion or hinder us from moving on with other people.
7 Tips for Moving On From a Crush
It might be tricky to move on from a crush when you still have strong feelings for them. If, however, any of the aforementioned arguments for letting go of a crush ring true, it’s time to take the first steps towards doing just that.
Humanize Them
When we develop a crush on someone, it’s easy to lose perspective and start seeing them as perfect. Humanising your crush and reframing the scenario as a whole may help you see things more clearly.
Journal and Make a List of Green, Yellow, and Red Flags
“Grab your favourite notebook or your notes app, head outside, breathe deep, and see what comes out on the page,” suggests Bonnie Scott, a therapist and the founder of Mindful Kindness Counselling. “You can also make a list of the relationship’s green, yellow, and red flags,” the prompt reads.
Avoid or Minimize Contact
Remember the old adage, “out of sight, out of mind?” When coping with a persistent crush, this rings true. The less time you spend thinking about them, the easier it will be to let them fade into the background. You can cool off by removing yourself from the situation if you’re actively interacting with the other person. This could include ignoring their texts, avoiding their social media, or avoiding places they frequent.
Prioritize Yourself
Find “distractions” by putting all of your energy into something other than your crush. That includes making time for the people who matter to you, engaging in the activities that interest you, and forming new relationships. “Make sure you’re eating well, sleeping well, and getting some movement into your week,” Goldman says. Perhaps this is a good moment to examine your own thought processes, the kinds of people with whom you surround yourself, and the motivations behind your actions.
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Practice Acceptance
If they haven’t shown any interest in dating you, it’s best to stop hoping for a change of heart and start looking for someone who will appreciate you for who you are. Please remember that you are not alone in experiencing these intense emotions. The pain of unrequited love is intense,
Meet New People
You may have discovered some interesting things about yourself during this crush. You’ve discovered what qualities in others attract you and what qualities repel you, and you have a deeper appreciation for the positive emotions that result from connecting with others. It may be time to meet new people and broaden your social circle.
“Check your library for group meetups, or other community calendars,” Scott recommends. Therefore, you can enjoy no-cost activities with other people.
Say No to Being Someone’s “Maybe”
Keep in mind that you are worthy of a partner who is just as enthusiastic about you. Time spent on a relationship that is doomed to fail is time wasted and can only lead to grief.
Wrapping oneself up in a crush also prevents you from investing in more meaningful relationships or experiences.