Aarti
There will be people in your life who don’t seem to want to be your friend. Infrequently making the first move in conversation, always being late, and always having an excuse for not meeting up are all red flags.
We will discuss ways to tell genuine friends from casual acquaintances. How to proceed in such a predicament is also discussed.
Why Recognizing True Friendships Matters
Because of our fundamental social makeup, we are hardwired to seek out and enjoy the company of others. Making and keeping friends is essential to your social and daily life, but it can become more challenging as you get older to locate people with whom you share like interests, concerns, and experiences.
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There will inevitably be instances when you wonder if a new acquaintance or an established friend views you the same way you do.
According to Avigail Lev, PsyD, founder and director of the Bay Area CBT Center, “if you are the one constantly reaching out and trying to maintain the friendship, while the other person seems passive or uninterested, it may be a sign that the other person does not want to be your friend and does not value your relationship.”
Signs Someone Doesn’t Want to Be Your Friend
It can be obvious when someone isn’t interested in being friends, but sometimes the signals are more subtle. Over the course of time, the people who were once fully invested in your relationship may begin to pull away.
Here are some indications that the other person doesn’t want to be your friend:
You Always Reach Out First
While it’s true that we all have busy schedules, it could be a red flag if you’re the one who always has to initiate contact with a buddy via phone, text, or email.
You may have also noticed that they are rarely accessible or receptive. They either ignore your texts or take an extremely lengthy time to respond. To paraphrase what Lev says, “it can feel like you’re the one reaching out all the time, and they don’t make an effort to keep in touch.”
Lack of Genuine Enthusiasm
The way someone responds to you in conversation is another strike against developing a personal connection with that individual.
In such cases, the other person may respond to your questions with a single word or show little enthusiasm when they do. The fact that you initiated contact adds insult to injury in most cases.
Being Reserved or Rude During Interactions
A person’s lack of desire in being more than a casual friend will show in the way they speak to you.
In contrast to how someone you consider a friend would speak or act, someone who doesn’t see you as a friend might come across as more professional or official, with more clipped comments when you meet in person or have a chat with them.
Sometimes they may make cutting remarks or even be nasty to you. They may try to bring you down by implying things about you that are harsh or rude. Lev warns that “the tone of their jokes or remarks can leave you feeling undermined or not valued in the friendship.”
